


Practice to Deceive

by angstbot



Series: Readers' Choice [20]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV), Swen, swan queen - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-12
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-09-17 01:32:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9298241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstbot/pseuds/angstbot
Summary: Emma overhears Regina telling a friend that she fakes it when Emma gives oral. Embarrassed and angry, she confronts Regina. After Emma calms down, she asks that Regina tell her what to do and Regina gives her very explicit instructions. R comes hard! AKA the prompt I hated. Readers’ Choice VII, part 2.





	

_O, what a tangled web we weave,_

_When first we practise to deceive!_

_― Sir Walter Scott, Marmion_

Emma was dead tired as she dragged herself home. Today had been one disaster after another, but not even like big epic disasters that made her feel like a badass. Instead, it had been little stupid things like spilling coffee on her favorite jeans and hitting her funny bone on the edge of her desk and getting a sharply-worded interdepartmental memo from Regina about keeping better records and staying within budget.

Henry had a sleepover already planned for tonight, so she didn’t have to pick him up, so at least that was one less thing. She always missed him when he wasn’t home, but she was definitely looking forward to a quiet evening in, just the two of them. All she wanted in the whole world right now was a long, hot bath, one of Regina’s delicious dinners, and some slow, easy sex.

As she sat on the bench in the mudroom inside the back door taking off her boots, she heard Regina’s voice and smiled. The sound came closer as she struggled with the laces, because of course today was the day she decided to wear the ones that never cooperated when she wanted to remove them.

“Oh Mal, I just don’t know what to do. I can’t _tell_ her.” It sounded like Regina was right outside the door now.

She must be on the phone, Emma realized, and felt a little guilty for eavesdropping.

“Yes, of course I love her. Of course we’re honest- I mean, _usually_.”

Oh shit, was this about _her_?

“But she’ll be crushed.”

Well _that_ sounded fucking awful. Emma swallowed hard.

“I’ve let it go too long. I can’t just tell her now.” She paused. “Well what am I supposed to say? I know you love cunnilingus, dear, but you’re terrible at it? And I’ve been faking my orgasms the entire time we have been having sex?!” Regina’s voice was rising now in frustration.

Oh. Oh god.

“No, Mal. No. I can’t possibly. It’s still wonderful and intimate when she touches me, and I’m not going to hurt her feelings that badly over something as minor as an orgasm.” Regina was moving away now, and soon she was out of earshot.

Regina had been faking her orgasms. Regina had been lying to her. Regina had been faking her orgasms the entire time they had been having sex. Regina had been lying to her the entire time they had been having sex.

Regina didn’t trust her enough to tell her she wasn’t making her come. Regina didn’t trust her. Regina didn’t trust her enough to tell her the truth.

But then, why the hell would Regina tell her the truth? She was such a shitty lover she hadn’t even _noticed_ that she wasn’t able to make her come. What kind of selfish asshole was she that she was just blissfully going along licking Regina because _she_ got off on it and never noticing that Regina didn’t even _like_ it? Fuck, it felt like she’d _violated_ Regina somehow, just imposing what she wanted on her without it being what she wanted, and how was Regina even still _with_ her, since she was so fucking awful and worthless?

And of course, of course, now that she was feeling like she’d finally found a home, now that she’d found someone who made her feel like she was good enough, she wasn’t good enough at all. She was still the one who got returned like defective merchandise by every foster family, the one nobody ever wanted to date more than a month or two at a time, the one who was never, never good enough for anyone, and Regina was just tolerating her, humoring her.

Regina had been faking her orgasms. Regina had been lying to her. Regina didn’t trust her. She was awful and worthless. Regina had been faking her orgasms. Regina had been lying to her. Regina didn’t trust her. She was awful and worthless.

**

“Emma?” she heard Regina again, coming toward the mudroom. “Emma, I know you have to be in there because the bug’s outside.”

She didn’t know how long she’d been sitting there, but the room had long since grown dark, and that seemed to match the agonizing thoughts chasing each other around in her head.

Regina opened the door and Emma flinched, only partially because of the light from the kitchen. “Emma? Are you alright?”

It was out of her mouth before she could stop it. “Why would you lie to me?”

“What? I haven’t- I wouldn’t- What are you-” Regina sputtered, confused and defensive.

“Why don’t you trust me?” She just kept staring down at the floor, unable to bear looking up at this person she loved so much and had failed so profoundly.

“I do trust you, Emma. What are you talking about?”

“Why don’t you trust me enough to tell me the truth?” she demanded, then wondered why she thought she had the right to demand anything of Regina.

“What truth, Emma? You’re not making sense,” and Regina’s tone was soothing now. “Did something happen?”

“But, I mean,” and Emma huffed a bitter chuckle, “why would you tell me the truth? How can I think I deserve the truth? I’m such an asshole I didn’t even _notice_ there was a problem. I’m some kind of _monster_ just _violating_ you like that.” She felt the tears burning behind her eyes and willed herself not to cry. That would be selfish and make this whole thing about _her_ rather than Regina. That was what she was already doing.

“This is about me?” Regina asked. “You feel as if you did something to me?”

“Of course I did something to you.” She swallowed hard. “I mean, how could I not? I’m so fucking awful and worthless.”

“You aren’t worthless at all,” Regina insisted. “Don’t say that. Emma, please tell me what’s happening,” she coaxed, coming in and crouching down in front of her to move into her line of sight.  

It hurt too much to look at her. Emma closed her eyes even as she went on, “But it was sort of inevitable, right? It was stupid to think I was good enough in the first place.” She huffed another humorless chuckle that teetered on the edge of being a sob. “How could I ever be good enough for anyone, especially someone as wonderful as you?”

She felt Regina’s hands cupping her face so, so gently. “Emma, please. What’s wrong? Talk to me,”

Emma couldn’t refuse her, even though it felt like she was being turned inside out as the words pushed out through her teeth. “You’ve been faking your orgasms the entire time we’ve been having sex. And I’m such a shitty lover that I didn’t even _notice_ I wasn’t making you come. I’m just- a- fucking- worthless, selfish _asshole_ who only cared about what I wanted, just- doing whatever I wanted with your body like some kind of monster. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” The tears were starting to fall now.

“Oh, Emma, no,” Regina murmured.

“I heard you,” she insisted. “I heard you say it. It’s okay, you don’t have to lie to save my feelings.” Of course Regina would try to protect her, even now, because she was so, so much better than Emma, and how had Emma treated her in return? Oh, here came the wracking sobs, and her body curled up on itself.

“No, no-no-no, my love. Emma, Emma,” Regina said, her voice full of pain as she got up and sat beside Emma on the bench and wrapped her in her arms. “Remember when we said it would be fun to roleplay? That I’d be giving you explicit directions about how to touch me and you’d play ignorant?”

Emma’s eyes snapped open, though her body kept on spasming. “But you told Mal I was bad at sex,” she insisted, confused. She’d heard that.

Regina started kissing her forehead and hair again and again as she murmured, “No, Emma, no. Not at all. I was pretending to be on the phone. I knew you were there, or I thought I did until you didn’t come in afterward. I thought you knew, and I was trying to start our special evening. I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you.”

Emma felt a tiny spark of hope. “It’s not real?”

“No, of course not!” Regina’s arms tightened around her. “You’re a wonderful lover, Emma Swan. You’ve made me ejaculate at least half a dozen times! How could I fake that?”

“I didn’t think about that,” Emma murmured almost inaudibly.

“Of course you didn’t.” Regina started rocking her slightly and pressed her lips against her temple. “You’ve been so undervalued your entire life. I’m so sorry, Emma. I didn’t think. I should have.”

“It’s fine,” Emma insisted, because it _was_ , now.

“It isn’t fine at all. I should have known. I would react exactly the same way if I heard that from you. How can I make it right?”

“Will you tell me?” Emma asked, her voice cracking. “Tell me what you want? Clear and specific and how it feels and that you like it?”

“Of course, my love.”

**

Things were, perhaps unsurprisingly, not very sexy when they got upstairs. Emma had stopped crying, but she was still all puffy and needed to blow her nose about ten times. Regina lay back on the bed and then coaxed her into resting her head on her chest, stroking her hair the way she did when she had occasional foster-system nightmares. Emma clutched at her at first as she curled into her side, the feeling of loss and horror still fresh in her mind even though she knew now it had all been a big misunderstanding.

Slowly, so slowly, her body relaxed, melting under Regina’s hypnotic touch, floating on her familiar perfume, feeling the familiar planes and curves of her body. This precious, exquisite, body she loved so much to touch. A little spark of desire formed in her chest.

“You really come for me?” she asked out of nowhere.

“Intensely,” Regina assured her. “And quickly. And repeatedly. You leave me the best kind of worn out, my love.”

“And you like it when I use my mouth?”

“Very much. You get so hungry for me, and your tongue is so nimble, and then when you suck-” she trailed off into a little “Mnh” that fanned Emma’s desire up into a flame.

“Do you think I could right now?” she asked, still hesitant.

Regina’s breath caught, but she exhaled slowly and answered, “Only if you want to.”

“I’m asking you to let me.”

Regina chuckled, and Emma felt a little sliver of fear creep back up her spine until fingers tightened in her hair and tipped her head back so their eyes could meet. “Let’s not prevaricate. Emma, dear, please lick my cunt until I come all over your pretty, precious face.”

Emma was pressed on top of her and kissing her deeply in the next breath, her thigh slotting between Regina’s and her hips beginning to rock.

After many long moments she made just enough space between them to start pulling at Regina’s clothes. The queen’s hands were on her jeans button in the next moment, and they collided.

“You do yours and I’ll do mine?” Emma suggested, and Regina nodded agreement.

After a few moments of efficient motions, their clothes were flung aside and Emma was on top of Regina again, but when her thigh slid back into place she moaned at how hot and slick the queen was.

“See how much I desire you? My body knows exactly the pleasure you bring.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna need to do that right now,” Emma moaned, starting to kiss her way down Regina’s body. Then she paused. “But you need to tell me what to do so I can be sure it’s what you want.”

“Emma, my cunt is dripping in anticipation because the way you make love to me is _perfect_.”

“Please?” and she couldn’t quite keep the wobble out of her voice.

“Of course, my love. On your front, between my thighs,” she instructed. Once Emma was there, she added, “Now part me with your thumbs. Look at how wet I am for you. Look at how swollen my clit is hoping you’ll touch her.”

Emma met her eyes. “Oh god, I want to.”

“Not yet. Look. _Really_ look. See my desire for you.”

Emma did, and she _was_ all wet and open and perfect and she felt a smile slide across her face.

“There you go. Now, give me long, slow strokes. Keep your tongue flat and soft. Ye-es,” she approved, sliding into a moan half way through the syllable, and it lit Emma’s body up to hear it.

After long moments of this, Emma started to think that maybe she should curl her tongue against Regina’s clit, but then she second-guessed it, because maybe that wasn’t what she wanted at all, and-

“Curl your tongue a bit now. Nnh, yes, at the top of the stroke, just like that. And then, oh yes, sideways like that. I love that. You feel so good.”

Emma had known what to do next before Regina even told her. Maybe she wasn’t bad at this after all.

And god, she loved eating Regina’s perfect pussy. She was so beautiful and so hot and slick in her mouth, and starting to breathe hard and moan for her. Emma suppressed the desire to wrap her arms around both thighs and devour her, because this was about what Regina wanted. She just focused on stroking steadily-

“Have I told you how much I love the way you desire?” Regina asked. “Your complete joy in my cunt, mmh, in my pleasure, in having me in your mouth. You revel in it. Sometimes you eat me like it hurts to take your mouth away, and you moan into me and- nnh- I can’t ever tell if it’s the vibrations against my clit or just your raw need for me but it is so, so good, my love.”

“Fuck,” Emma moaned against her, sliding her arms under her thighs and pulling her hips toward her mouth.

“Yes! Exactly like that!” Regina encouraged, planting her feet on the bed to let her hips work on Emma’s mouth now and gripping her hair again. “Want me. Unh- Show me.”

Emma would have moaned and fluttered her tongue faster and fed Regina’s hips up toward her mouth anyway, but hearing her demand it made it impossibly better, and her own hips were starting to work against the bed now because this was impossibly hot. And god, she wanted to be inside her, to feel her ripple around her fingers like liquid velvet.

She was already moving to release one hip when Regina insisted, “Inside me.” She was knuckle deep by the time Regina’s “Fill me up-” trailed off into a moan.

Emma began moving slowly, but in long strokes, out almost to the tip and then going deep. She realized she was beginning to trust her instincts for how to give Regina pleasure again when she sped up her motion and began curling her fingers on the out-stroke.  

“Yes! Yes, my love, just like that, so good.” Regina breathed hard for a moment, and Emma could see a slight sheen of sweat when she looked up at her adoringly. Then the queen went on, “I love when you stroke my g-spot. Mmh. I love it when you make me squirt.”

“Oh fuck,” Emma moaned against her, sliding her lips around Regina’s clit to suck, wanting to feel her in her mouth and swirl her tongue around her and make Regina come so, so hard. She stayed with Regina as her hips stopped moving, as her body tensed and curled up on itself, as her pussy clenched around her fingers, reading her responses and giving her more—sucking harder, and then fluttering her tongue faster, and then adding another finger, and then fucking her faster. She knew what Regina needed; she could hear her moans and feel her wetness and, oh- feel her come, a gush of fluid against her face matching the squeeze of her muscles around Emma’s fingers.

Fuck, she was beautiful when she did that, and she really _did_ do that. Emma did that. Emma made her do that. Emma loved making her do that. Emma wanted to do it again.

Looking up at Regina, she saw an indulgent smile, as if she knew, and instead of feeling embarrassed, Emma just smiled right back and asked, “Again?”

“There’s my confident lover,” Regina purred. “I missed you. On your back, please.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes, I’m going to ride your face,” Regina explained as she rose to her knees. Then she paused, looking down Emma’s body, and when she looked back up she had a wicked grin. “And since you’re so gloriously aroused you’re going to use those wonderful fingers of yours to come with me in your mouth, the way you love so much.”

“Fuck, Regina.”

Regina just chuckled and settled astride her face. Emma gripped her hip to hold her to her mouth immediately, lapping eagerly at her. Her other hand went nearly as fast to her own pussy, where she was as totally soaked as Regina had said. She started rubbing circles on her clit in time with her tongue on Regina’s, and oh god this was so good.

Gradually, their shared rhythm ramped up. Regina’s hips worked on Emma’s mouth and Emma’s fingers worked against her pussy, first almost-lazy grinding and stroking, then steady rocking and rubbing, then quick twitches and tight, focused circles.

Soon Emma couldn’t focus at all and began sucking at Regina’s clit because that was what she could handle, just as the queen’s motions against her mouth became shorter and sharper, fucking her face as she got closer to coming. This was so good, _they_ were so good, so in tune, so right. Emma was delirious with the pleasure of it, and her eyes rolled back in her head as her world became nothing but electric sensation and the taste of Regina.

Then Regina was coming, and Emma went right along with her.  

Regina slithered down her body and looked her very seriously in the eye. “I,” and a kiss, “love,” kiss, “your,” kiss, “mouth. Do you believe me now?”

Emma nodded. Her cheeks hurt from the wideness of her smile.


End file.
